Renegade

You

It shouldn't have been this hard

It shouldn't have taken this long

I felt like I was doing something wrong any way I chose to go

It's you

Would I dare betray you and walk the other way?

I should've. I could've.

But I felt something pulling me, capturing me, keeping me from ever escaping

It was numbing

It's all you

Alas, I pondered like a little kid,

What it would be like to feel the sun's embrace

What it would be like to feel the softness of grass beneath my scarred feet

It was promising

It's always you

Apathy you wore like a leopard wears its spots

My ignorant little mind took it for sophistication

Lies you sold for my sanity, I took for love

It was suffocating

I'm here because of you

I'd forgotten all things beautiful, in the disbelief you'd be

the one to take what I earned away

And I know now what I have to do

My faith that turned the colour of the sea begs to be saved

But we're all human

Yet here I am, a renegade on his knees

Waiting patiently for your forgiveness.